D A L I F . C O M

I just can't seem to get my act together these days. Everything is hazy and bland. There's no red thread for me to follow, and I feel lost and bewildered. The proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, that sometimes shines ever so bright, hasn't shown it's ugly mug the past.. I dunno how long. 

Perhaps it's time for professional help.

Squirrels are pretty amusing little creatures. They are lightning fast, and have rapid and erratic movements. They are also fairly cute. Came upon the following little clip yesterday, and watched it a load of times. I laugh the same everytime I watch it. One squirrel plays dead a record two times within seconds, to try and fool his adversary (another squirrel) in a backyard brawl. What I find the most amusing is the other squirrels reaction to this behavior. First time it goes down, squirrel two is looking like he's going: "What is this now... no come on, this can't be right!". Then Squirrel 1 comes back up, and attacks again, only to go straight down. And squirrel 2 once more looks like it's thinking: Seriously dude... you can't expect me to believe this. I don't even care about this fight anymore". The fight doesn't even really look that hardcore. It's like they're just messing with each other. Anyway, the second squirrel is priceless. Check it out.

Squirrel Plays Dead During Backyard Fight

Several people over the course of this blog's existence, have come to me with the same question. Now, I might be wrong, but I'm guessing the whole world has coordinated a question posing schedule, in which all 6 billion humans will eventually ask me this very question. Because I'm such a bad sport, I've decided to foil their evil and callous plan before it goes totally out of control, but simply answering it here, once and for all;

The question is: How do you write the entries for dalif.com... How is it done? What goes on behind the hard candyshell exterior of this magnificient blog?

Well, my dearest of readers. It basically breaks down like this. This system allows me to alter the post date of entries both before and after they are posted. So that means, I can write stuff, and have it automatically post itself at a given time. In effect, this means I can write 10 entries and then have them posted on a schedule. And that is exactly what I do. Perhaps not 10 entries... But I normally write 4-5 at a time, and have them post over the course of usually double the days. Sometimes I want stuff to come out related to another post, and I have them posted right after one another.

Of course, sometimes there are singular posts among them, but generally, I do this multiposting. That means I can write like a madman for a while, then relax and think up new stuff in the meantime. Yes, sometimes I have dry spells, but still... I'm always cooking something up.

Anyway, I hope that answered your question, planet earth! Don't need to worry yourselves anymore. Mkay?

Finishing off a 4 day posting streak, I decided to toss in quite a few little stories in this one. Because none of them warranted a full post by their onsies. Starting out, I'm getting these small stories from a little note I'm getting used to carry around with me all the time. That and a pen. I'm tired of having a gazillion sweet and cool ideas for stuff when I'm out and about, but as soon as I sit my ass down in front of the computer, my mind draws the proverbial blank... and nothing comes of it. However, the thing is, with little notes you leave for yourself, that when you read them days or weeks later, you've no idea what the two-three words on the paper refer to. Thankfully, I remember like 75% of the stuff I've jotted down, so I think I'll make it through this post without anybody raising eyebrows.

First off, we had a guest named Barbosa the other day. Now for the non Piraty folk out there, hearing the name Barbosa will very likely not mean a great deal to you. But for the Sparrowian lovers among us, Barbosa will of course refer to Captain Jack's nemesis (or at least one of them) and later ally, in the PotC franchise. While this particular tidbit isn't HAHAHA OMG funny, it's still somewhat nifty in my not at all humble opinion. Sadly, the guest's first name wasn't Hector. Had it in fact been, I might've had to say "You're off the edge of the map now mate. Here be monsters!". This wasn't the case tho, so I left the guest alone. Turned out he was a regular guest, and would've very likely not appreciated the gesture. In my head, as with so so much other stuff, it was funny as hell.

Had another guest who noticed I was left handed, when I wrote the room number on the little key-wallet thingy. "1 in 10, is what I've heard, sir" was what I replied. He then told me, as guests tend to do when they think I'm interested (which, in this particular case I just so happened to be), a story about his childhood, seing as he was lefthanded as well. His dad used to hit his left hand, when he wrote with it, and he had to sit on it in school. A story I've been told before, by others. It's pretty interesting actually, how long being left handed has been associated with something bad. And of course, as with almost everything else bad, it is rooted in religion. Catholicism, I'd take it, figured that since only a few people were left handed, it must have something to do with our old friend, the devil. Yup, sweet Lucifer is always around, trying to get those pesky catholics. Fuckers. Anyway, they thought it so bad, apparently, that they adapted the latin word for left, Sinister, as a word for something really mean and calous. I ended the conversation with the guest by saying: "I'm glad I wasn't...". He interrupted me by saying "Catholic?" which I found pretty humorous. "No, I was gonna say I'm glad I wasn't born in the days where stuff like that happened. But sure.. catholic too". Why can't all guests be like that guy. He was fun.

Besides the little kinks I'm writing about here, I like the hotel a lot. As opposed to other hotels I've been in, this particular one actually does feel like, however cliché it sounds, a large closely related group and/or family. Everybody knows everybody. The GM is a good guy, who isn't too high and mighty to smile, shake hands and talk to new people he hasn't seen before, when he passes through. The managers seems like they are still part of the group, instead of being these distant weird people you only know by name. It combines high quality products and service, with fun and relaxed atmosphere. I'm very impressed. Besides my little goof up, of taking all these evening shifts, instead of doing the nightshifts I so enjoy, I'm happy I joined the staff. The benefits I guess, along with the salary and the sparetime will do me oh so well. I dunno what the future will bring in terms of using the last two years of experience and bills for something constructive. But despite my wanting to play down my skills, I did in fact learn a lot of stuff.. and with a bit of effort, I can develope it to a level where I might be able to make some money off of it, freelance. Got a few gigs already, that I could potentially get something from. It's an interesting thought, for sure... I'll persue it, when I'm confident with what I'm doing now.

Weird, isn't it.. I thought I had a lot more to say, but I can't make heads or tails in the last two-three items on my little note. So I'll just toss it, and remember: I'm working in a place where stuff happens all the time. Like the screaming lady who wanted to exchange currency the other day, and was hella pissed that we didn't have euros laying around willy nilly. She wanted to exchange a 50, get 20 of them in danish kroner, and the rest back in euro. I was like: This isn't a bank, lady. She started yelling about us being an international hotel blah blah. She didn't even live here, so I considered just telling her to fuck off. But again, she did have an amusing streak to her. I told her it might be an international chain of hotels, but this was still a Danish hotel located in Denmark. And as a rule, we just didn't have currency around. End of discussion. So she settled for exchanging her 50 note, and get it all in kroner. If she had just gone elsewhere, she'd have gotten a lot more, since our rates are insanely shit (hey, a man's gotta make money, yeah?). I don't get people like her. Making a fuss over something totally pointless. But who am I to judge. At least I've got another paragraph in this post :) Catch you bastardos on the flipside.