Not Quite IRL

As you'll probably know, I was riffling through boxes today, trying to tidy up in some of the crap I've got around. Well I did manage to sort 5 years worth of opened and unopened mail. Bank letters, all kinds of official letters, letters from various agencies... that sort of stuff. Boring, but I'd rather keep it sorted in case I needed a specific letter one day, I'd be able to find it, instead of, as usual, having no idea where stuff is. Anyway, in the box with the mail, I also found a bag of misc stuff. Some gamepads, old receipts, a few manuals for different electronic gadgets, a small piggy bank with foreign coins... I also found a pair of handcuffs. That costs me nearly 3 hours of productive time spent in agony.

I used to have two pairs. They are essentially playthings, but whereas one of them has a small mechanism for unlocking the cuffs, the other pair does not. That pair was always the most fun, seing as getting out of them actually constituted a challenge. I spent many an hour picking the cuffs in all kinds of scenarios. Locked to a chair or a table or whav have we. I managed to pick the locks of both cuffs behind my back in 11 seconds flat, with just a paper clip. Cool, I thought back then. I had the same thought for a while today. But I knew just tossing the cuffs on willy nilly would probably be a mistake. So I found a paper clip, and picked the lock of one side of the cuffs. Was easy. Cool, thought I. I must still have my mad skillz of yesteryear. So I toss the cuffs on, and start picking. But they aren't coming off as easily as I had imagined. In fact, they aren't coming off at all. I pick away, but can't seem to get the technique down properly. An hour passes where I'm focused on getting the cuffs open, without success. I consider briefly looking for a key that's bound to be around somewhere. But it'd take me forever to find one, provided I even have one still.

Another hour passes, and I'm still not getting them open. My paperclip is worn thin at this point. Has already broken once, and I'm not sure where to find another. I start prowling the apartment for items that can be used. But I come up empty. Not gonna say I panicked at any point, but.. it was starting to get pretty annoying. Also, my wrists were turning red. Finally, the left side popped open, and I went to town on the right side with renewed vigor. My dad was supposed to visit during the evening, and I slowly realized I probably wouldn't be able to get the cuffs all the way off before he came around.

And I wasn't. So I presented the problem to him, and he tried to pick the lock for a bit. But he had less understanding of the locking mechanism than I had, so I decided I'd just keep trying idly, while chatting to him. So I did. 30 minutes later, they popped off, and I could rub my burning right wrist and once more smell the clean brisk air of freedom. The cuffs are now on the kitchen table, and while I think it'll be a while before I give them a go again, I can't help but admit it was fun with a bit of a challenge. I'll need more paperclips first tho :)